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Monday, March 30, 2009

Possibility 


Sometimes, all it takes to fall into bed with someone is a look.

Whilst I would never say that any situation affords a ‘sure thing’ in terms of casual sex, and I’m certainly no better placed than the average person in having luck in this area, I do know I am skilled at one thing: I’m perceptive about, and have an awareness of, a sexual opportunity that might await, because I’ve been able to read the possibility of it in someone’s eyes.

I can’t quite describe what exactly it is that I can see: a certain twinkling in the iris, perhaps, or a gaze that’s fixed and unblinking. But what I do know is that behind the shimmer of their stare lies a certain candidness, an aptitude for adventure, and this almost always translates into an open-mindedness about sex, and the possibility of it happening right there, right then.

I’m not referring to “fuck me”- (or, indeed, “I want to fuck you”) -eyes: many, many people show those, in a variety of social situations, and I tend to shy away from the blokes whose desperation is evident in their facial expressions. (Which is why I don’t do that whole meat-market pulling-in-clubs thing.) It’s but a tiny minority of people that show ‘possibility’, rather than ‘horniness’, in their eyes, and those who know to what I refer will know just how few people grasp this vast difference in micro-expressions.

So when I recently found myself caught in the gaze of a man, and saw his bright blue eyes sparkle, it took me a brief second to adjust: seeing that ‘look’ is not something I encounter very often. He smiled at me and I was momentarily caught between rejoining my friends at the bar, or stopping in my tracks to talk with him.

I chose the latter.

We chatted and flirted and before I knew it we had exchanged numbers, were discussing the fact that my rented apartment was only two minutes walk away, and agreeing that he should come back to mine for a nightcap. It was fluid, simple, relaxed. It was possibility.

We decided to head off, and waited for his mate to return from the bathroom. As we did, Blue Eyes asked me, with a slight lift to his voice and a smirk firmly planted on his lips, a pointed question:

“What about my friend?”

Thoughts raced through my head and I wondered: did he mean how do we ditch his friend? Or, did he mean, should we invite his friend along?

He fixed me with his gaze, as if his eyes had a bright light flickering behind them, and with the way he looked at me, and the suggestion of excitement in his voice, I took the chance he was referring to the possibility of the latter.

“Well, I’m an open-minded kind of woman”, I replied, before I had the chance to think through what I was saying.

Again, his eyes danced, and his smile widened.

“That sounds good to me”, he said, a cheeky grin spreading across his lips.

“So, if your friend came back for a nightcap too, that’s alright with you?”

He nodded. “Sure. Let me check with him and then let’s get out of here.”

A moment later his friend – a similarly handsome man, but with brown eyes – returned, and I walked in front of them, partly to lead the way to the exit, but partly to give them the space to talk. My heart pounded with a mixture of excitement and fear, but I tried to maintain an air of calm as I walked – not easy for me, being a clumsy klutz.

Less than 30 seconds later they both caught up with me.

“So, back to yours, right?” Brown Eyes said, smiling.

I turned to look at Blue Eyes, who was also smiling at me. “Yup” I replied, “it’s only a minute away.”

We left the bar and, flanked either side by them, the three of us began the short stroll back to my place, chatting and laughing along the way.

As we walked, I couldn’t help but wonder how different the outcome might have been, had I not picked up on, or responded to Blue Eyes’ initial look; if I’d been closed to spontaneous opportunities happening and ignored his suggestion; or, if I’d dwelled on my (suppressed, but still existing) nervousness about the situation.

But those thoughts were only momentary: I had other, more important things on my mind; like, for example, that there was a real possibility this night could end up resulting in my first ever threesome with two men.

[To be continued…]

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