At a book reading the other day, I realised I was surrounded by attractive men. Not because their faces were particularly handsome or due to their having shapely arses (being seated on the floor sadly prevented my scoping out their curves). No, there was something else I noticed about these men that was getting my pants wet, and that something was their hands.

I know I have spoken about men’s hands before – and for good reason: I find hands one of the most attractive parts of a man, after his face, eyes and mouth. This isn’t due to any correlation between hand-size and penis-size: besides being a completely unfounded myth (trust me, I have done lots of research); I really have no interest in the size of a man’s nob. Yes, I know some women are ‘size queens’ - excuse me while I yawn from boredom at their narrow-mindedness - but for me, what I like about cocks, is not so much size, or shape even, but just the fact that, well, they feel so bloody nice inside me. So as long as said owner of penis knows what he’s doing, I’m not really bothered or impressed by measurements: with shagging, I just want to be fucked how I want, when I want, and I’m happy.

But hands? Another matter entirely. I am a hand-phile: I love them. The size and shape of a man’s hands are enough to make me want to turn my head in complete disinterest (Leonardo DiCaprio: yuck), or otherwise want to jump on top of them (Paddy Considine: yum). I know I am very prejudiced in such matters – I’m only interested in large hands with long, solid fingers - but if a man has nice hands, it gets me hot, and I’ll want his fingers inside me, pronto. Fuck foreplay: all a man’s gotta have are the right hands and I’m wet. So yes, hands are very important to me.

Anyway, sitting amongst this thirty-something crowd, I became aware of just how many guys seemed to have gorgeous hands. All around me were guys with large, strong hands; fingers that seemed perfect for penetration. I was shocked at the sheer number of decent hands in the room and found myself getting distracted… Besides my getting horny, it did make me wonder: do bookish blokes have sexier hands? I know that of the men whom have made me go weak at the knees, they were all guys who enjoy a good book or five, and their hands were gorgeous. So could there be a correlation between the type of man to turn up to a book reading and the size of his hands? Does a man need to have big fingers to be into books? (I imagine it would help with page-turning and the like). Or am I just drawing a conclusion based on no real evidence? Perhaps I should investigate this further and find some empirical proof…

Probably best not to investigate on a first date though: my asking a man what his preferred reading material is, alongside a demand to see his hands, might not cast me in the best light. Though, thinking about it, by getting blokes to talk about what books they enjoy, that might be a good way to quickly eliminate the tossers from my ‘potential’ list, because I guarantee, no fan of Clarkson is ever going to bring me off – even if his fingers were supreme.