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Sunday, June 11, 2006


Pros and cons of being admitted to hospital:


  1. Being looked after, cared for, and felt up all over by the extraordinarily handsome, kind and hardworking Accident & Emergency nurses and doctors.


  1. Being in excruciating agony and passing out from the pain
  2. Having to wait over three hours in a busy A & E department before eventually seeing a doctor and given painkillers
  3. Getting painfully poked, prodded and internally examined by complete strangers
  4. Being unable to sleep due to my discomfort and the noise on the ward
  5. Getting visited by a succession of surgeons who casually - and somewhat gleefully - talked about cutting me open to sort out my insides
  6. Being stuck indoors in a stifling hospital ward during the hottest week this year
  7. Missing two dates with sexy men that I was due to have
  8. Not having my laptop with me to write
  9. Being too drugged up on painkillers to feel creative
  10. Being unable to have a fiddle due to
  • the pain
  • the proximity of other patients
  • having my blood pressure taken by a nurse every thirty minutes

Thankfully I am over the worst now, though I’m a little shaken by the experience. I’m still in quite a bit of pain, but am pleased to report it is lessening.

Hopefully, I’ll be back to my old ways shortly. Though perhaps I shouldn’t rush into any rampant shags in the near future – I wouldn’t want to split anything.

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