Girl with a one-track mind

Friday, October 30, 2009

Hello

I'm still here, just been very, very busy. I have at least half a dozen almost-finished blog posts sitting on my laptop which I will publish as soon as I get the chance. I'm only human, so cut me some slack, ta.

In the meantime, you can always follow me on Twitter, or keep up with my news on Facebook; and if you're a first time visitor here, dropping in via the television documentary screened on More4 tonight and tomorrow night, [UPDATE: or via this BBC documentary], welcome: you'll find 5+ years of archives in the sidebar to your left.

Right, more coffee to drink, more work to do. Back soon, promise.

// posted by thegirl @ 5:17:00 PM

Monday, August 03, 2009

Wand

As regular readers will know, I only rarely plug products on this blog. Mostly this is because –

a) Sexbloggers' reviews of sex toys are dull as fuck to read;
b) Many sex toys are crap and not worth discussing;
c) I've better things to write about (when I have time);

– so I don't see the point in regularly churning out dross detailing which toy I used to wank with last week. (And I'd only refer back to my Top Ten lists of toys for women, men and (hetro) couples, anyway.)

However, I just spotted that this Durex Wand is on sale (at my preferred store Lovehoney) with more than a forty quid reduction, and because I've been recently playing around with this toy and think it is excellent (mains-rechargable; great massager; very strong, quiet vibrations; really nice to use on both him and her), I figured I should give others the heads-up so they can take advantage of how cheap it is.

Plus, you can always pretend it's a microphone and interview each other in bed, which is a bonus, I reckon.

Well, it made us laugh.

// posted by thegirl @ 4:23:00 PM

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Kiss

The first time I met him face-to-face I wanted to kiss him.

Actually, I had wanted to kiss him for some weeks; each conversation we had over email, IM, or Skype increased my desire, so that by the time I finally saw him in the flesh I was almost craven with my need to feel his lips against mine.

Ever present in my mind, though, was that the feeling might not be mutual: how can you know if there’s real chemistry until you meet offline? Not to mention, of course, the fact that he’d recently learned of my Girl with a One Track Mind infamy, and I was anxious to show him another side of me, so that he would be getting to know me, Zoe, not the obsessed-with-shagging ‘notorious’ sex diarist.

But I still wanted to kiss him, god how I wanted that.

I had a meeting in town and we agreed to meet up after that for coffee. My meeting finished early and I sat, nervously adjusting my skirt, in a coffee shop. I had partly dressed for my meeting and partly dressed for our date and struggled to find clothing that was appropriate for both. How to appear professional at a business meeting and sexy – but not too sexy – at a daytime date? I mentioned this to him over IM and he seemed shocked: had I not heard of the film Secretary? he asked. When he said that, I smiled inwardly and was reminded of a long-ago conversation I’d had with my friend Badman, about how one should test out people’s openness about sex and kink, by asking them if they’d seen Secretary. So I opted for the Maggie Gyllenhaal look of a fitted white shirt, black pencil skirt, and black peep-toe heels, and hoped that he’d like what he saw.

I waited for him to arrive and tried to catch up with work on my laptop, becoming so immersed in what I was doing that I didn’t see him until he was standing right in front of me. He was dressed – as he always is – sharply, a smart pressed grey jacket just covering a black shirt, and his Vans sneakers matching both the colour of his jacket and the salt and pepper of his hair. On his face was a huge grin, and instantly all my anxiety and worry disappeared into the air.

I jumped to my feet and our smiles matched as we each mouthed a quiet ‘hi’ amongst the hubbub of the coffee shop. We both simultaneously reached out into an embrace and we stood there a moment, our arms wrapped around each other, my face buried into his neck. I was faintly aware of the length of time we were intertwined, and how closely our bodies were pressed against the other – it was very intimate for such a public place – but I didn’t care. All I wanted to do was breathe in the delicious aroma of his skin and feel the curves of his body against mine.

At some point, we both pulled back, slightly, and then before there was time for me to question it, or become anxious or succumb to nerves, he leaned in towards me and pressed his lips against mine and the kiss I had been waiting for, been wanting so badly, was happening. The anticipation had been building for some weeks and now finally, in one swift moment, it was here.

His kiss made me tremble, as I thought it might. With the gentle but firm pressure of his lips on my mouth, I felt electricity run through me: my whole body felt like it was tingling. More specifically, though, was the throb between my legs that his kiss had elicited: it was as if my pussy had a pulse of its own; a surging blood supply; a separate beating heart. Kissing him made my entire body feel alive and I wanted to greedily devour his lips, his tongue, and his breath like each was oxygen energising me.

We spent much of the date continuing to kiss, stopping only briefly for coffee, cake and of course conversation. Our “quick coffee” turned into a ten-hour date, and neither of us wished for it to end. It was so natural, so easy and relaxed, and with him, the hours went by like minutes.

I confessed to him, a few weeks later, just how turned on I had become, through those kisses. That sitting there, in that café, with his lips against mine, had left me so horny that I wanted to fuck him then and there. I described to him how, after some hours had passed, I had gone to the toilet and my knickers were so wet from my desire for him that I had to peel them off me before I could remove them.

His kisses still do that: whenever he places his mouth on mine, my pussy almost has a Pavlovian response, and I instantly get wet. “Your lips make my lips throb”, I informed him recently, to which he grinned, mischievously, and kissed me some more.

But besides the horniness that his kisses inspire, they now affect something else much deeper, and more pronounced, in me: they make me feel like I am me; they make me feel like I am home.

// posted by thegirl @ 1:23:00 PM

Monday, June 29, 2009

Contribute

1. You may recall that I'm an ambassador for the young people's sexual health charity Brook. Some Brook employees are running the London 10K race next weekend (I am not able to join them, sadly, due to my injured shoulder) to raise funds for the charity. If you'd like to help support all their hard work, you can donate here. Please give generously: we need people like Brook.

2. I'm proud to announce that alongside some very distinguished writers – Richard Dawkins, Charlie Brooker, Ben Goldacre, Richard Herring and many others – a contribution of mine has been included in the upcoming book, "The Atheist's Guide to Christmas". The book is edited by the wonderful Ariane Sherine – founder of the Atheist Bus Campaign – and you can pre-order it now. All proceeds go to a wonderful cause: the HIV charity, The Terrence Higgins Trust. Buy it now, in time for Christmas!

3. Speaking of Ben Goldacre, I will be chairing his "Beyond Bad Science" and Bill Thompson's "10 cultures" sessions at Open Tech this coming Saturday, as well as moderating Suw Charman-Anderson's "Women in Tech" session. They – and all the other talks – are going to be great sessions with some fantastic debates: come along and join in!

// posted by thegirl @ 7:56:00 PM

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Integrity

Let us be clear: this is not a fight between 'old' and 'new' media. This not about blogger vengeance or a mob mentality wanting to lay in to print media. This is about journalistic integrity, immorality, and a few unethical hacks desperate to make their mark in the newspaper industry.

The digital age has given people access to instant information, interactive feedback, and the freedom to reply, so the vast, angry, Internet response to The Sunday Times outing me, and, indeed, last week's outing of fellow anonymous blogger Night Jack, by sister paper The Times was not a bloggers vs. journalists battle. Instead, it was simply a reaction of disgust that journalistic standards have sunk so low: is this what 'news' reporting has come to?

The journalist who outed me has now justified doing so by stating my anonymity was a "marketing gimmick"; this just smacks of pathetic desperation. My writing a sexblog and book was hardly newsworthy - it's not like I was writing about anything criminal, or shagging a politician - and my being anonymous for almost three years, until I was outed, doesn't support this supposed pre-meditated book-selling ploy.

I had my reasons for wanting to remain anonymous, as all anon bloggers do, and did everything in my power to remain so; sadly that wasn't enough for this keen journalist, eager to get her foot on the quality journalistic ladder.

Ethical and moral questions need to be asked when it comes to undermining people's privacy, revealing their identities, and exposing sources. It doesn't keep bloggers in check, by outing the odd one or two; instead it just shows the hypocrisy of some journalists, so keen to protect their own sources. But, more importantly, it undermines the little confidence the public have left in the press, and it is this, inevitably, that will impact journalism in the long term.

If you're going to be a newsgatherer, I believe you have certain choices to make: ones which will affect your career, but also your conscience. You may feel you can justify writing something which hugely impacts another's life because they deserve it in some way; you may feel you can justify your underhand tactics in obtaining a scoop; you may even feel you can justify your immoral behaviour afterwards, by arguing that people have been mean to you. But you reap what you sow: be prepared to take the dirt you've chosen to dish out.

If you can't hack it, don't write it.

from Anna Mikhailova mikhailova.anna@[redacted]
to girlwithaonetrackmind@gmail.com
date Fri, Aug 4, 2006 at 4:07 PM
subject FAO Zoe Margolis

Dear Zoe,

I am a freelance journalist and am writing a story about you and your identity as Abby Lee, the author of the recently released 'Girl With a One Track Mind'. I would like to speak to you so that you can put forward your side of the story, and I hope that you will cooperate with me. I have a photo of you, which would accompany the piece, however it is not a very good photo, particularly considering Abby's image, and I'm sure you would prefer to have one taken in a professional studio, at an angle of your wish, all of which could be arranged.

My mobile number is 079[redacted]. I look forward to hearing from you soon,

Anna

from Anna Mikhailova mikhailova.anna@[redacted]
to girlwithaonetrackmind@gmail.com
date Fri, Aug 4, 2006 at 6:45 PM
subject photo

Hi Zoe,

Following on from my earlier message, this is the photo that I propose to be used alongside my article. As I said earlier, it would be possible to arrange a professional shot in a studio, which would be more appropriate for the persona of Abby Lee. I await your response,

Anna

from Anna Mikhailova mikhailova.anna@[redacted]
to girlwithaonetrackmind@gmail.com
date Fri, Aug 4, 2006 at 7:48 PM
subject FAO Zoe Margolis

Dear Zoe,

I have decided to offer the story to The Sunday Times, having done some work for them over the summer and because they serialised your book not so long ago. The News Desk has expressed an interest and is planning to run the story this Sunday. I have sent over my copy and the photo I have of you. The picture shows that you are wearing a Tshirt with the words 'Safe but not Clean' on it. I am trying to do this in the most friendly and responsible way I can. If you wish to influence the copy and the photographic content of the piece, do please get in touch with me this evening. I am planning to leave my computer in the next hour, so please call me on my mobile as soon as you can.

Thank you and I look forward to hearing from you,

Anna

from Anna Mikhailova mikhailova.anna@[redacted]
to girlwithaonetrackmind@gmail.com
date Fri, Aug 4, 2006 at 8:48 PM
subject FAO Zoe Margolis - photo

Dear Zoe,

Just some more details about the photo - The Sunday Times said they will provide their most senior portrait photographer, Francesco Guidicini, who does the shoots of all the stars and is the personal photographer to Jemima Khan, to take the new photos of you. They can also arrange a car to pick you up tomorrow, and everything else at your convenience. I assume you would want to do your own make up and choice of outfit, however they said they could arrange this as well, since they want the photos to be as sexy and elegant as possible. They said the shoot would need to take place at around 10 in the morning tomorrow. Therefore do let me know what your decision is.

If you agree to cooperate by coming to the studio tomorrow morning, the News Editor told me that he is prepared to give you written assurance about which photos will or will not be used to accompany my piece. Therefore, if we do get a new photo taken with your cooperation, then it will be used in place of the one I sent you earlier.

I look forward to hearing from you,

Anna

from Hellen, Nicholas nicholas.hellen@[redacted]
to girlwithaonetrackmind@gmail.com
date Sat, Aug 5, 2006 at 12:08 PM
subject FW: Sunday Times news story - urgent

Dear Miss [my name],

We intend to publish a prominent news story in this weekend's paper, revealing your identity as the author of the book, Girl With a One Track Mind.

We have matched up the dates of films you have worked on - Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Batman Begins and Lara Croft Tomb Raider - and it is clear that they correlate to your blog. We have obtained your birth certificate, and details about where you went to school and college.

We propose to publish the fact that you are 33 and live in [my address] -London, and that your mother, [her name], is a [her address] -based [her profession]. The article includes extracts from your book and blog, relevant to your career in the film industry. We also have a picture of you, taken outside your flat.

Unfortunately, the picture is not particularly flattering and might undermine the image that has been built up around your persona as Abby Lee. I think it would be helpful to both sides if you agreed to a photo shoot today so that we can publish a more attractive image.

We are proposing to assign you our senior portrait photographer, Francesco Guidicini, and would arrange everything to your convenience, including a car to pick you up. We would expect you to provide your own clothes and make up. As the story will be on a colour page, we would prefer the outfit to be one of colourful eveningwear.

We did put this proposal to you yesterday, but heard nothing back. Clearly this is now a matter of urgency, and I would appreciate you contacting me as soon as possible. To avoid any doubt we will, of course, publish the story as it is if we do not hear from you.

Yours sincerely,
Nicholas Hellen

Acting News Editor
Sunday Times

// posted by thegirl @ 6:07:00 PM

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Privacy

So the Times newspaper has outed another anonymous blogger, 'eh? Congratulations to them, I hope they feel proud of their achievement. Real quality journalism, there.

People will argue, I'm sure, that this story was different to mine; that because the blogger [Night Jack: blog now deleted as a result of his outing] was a policeman it was therefore "in the public interest" that his real identity should be known.

There will be others, of course, who'll applaud this judge's ruling for upholding "freedom of information" and "openness and transparency" for the "public interest" stories covered by journalists.

But those of us who have chosen to be anonymous online, have done so with good reason; so after losing my own anonymity, and experiencing first hand the ruthless behaviour of some elements of the press, I will continue to fight for the right of other bloggers to keep their identity hidden.

With the current situation in Iran, we are reminded of the need for online anonymity for those people who are, quite literally, risking their lives to get their messages out, so this landmark ruling in the British courts is extremely worrying and a threat to all of our rights to privacy.

As for the Times, well, my opinion of the paper is pretty much unprintable, but it would definitely include the word 'scumfucks'.

// posted by thegirl @ 4:02:00 PM

Monday, June 15, 2009

Sore

– "You do realise, don't you, that people always say, "Oh, you're simply in a 'honeymoon' period: you'll both calm down after a while!". I have to let you know: there'll be no end to it - I just have a rampant sexual appetite."

– "I know."

– "So be prepared, is all: you're going to have a very sore cock."

– "I already have one."

// posted by thegirl @ 11:04:00 PM

On the web

Recent posts

Blogs I read

Places I shop

Stats and stuff